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User talk:DarkestNight1
Welcome Hi, welcome to Creepypasta Wiki! Thanks for your edit to the User talk:DarkestNight1 page. Please be sure to check out all the Site Rules, as it is important to follow them. Failure to abide by them may result in your account being blocked. Read some new pastas by checking out or browse by topic by checking out the Genre Listing. Please leave a message on my talk page if I can help with anything! EmpyrealInvective (talk) 07:59, January 16, 2016 (UTC) However the story was not up to quality standards. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 08:05, January 16, 2016 (UTC) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 08:16, January 16, 2016 (UTC) Re: Story I'm sorry, but your story is not up to our quality standards. There is a lot of awkward/nonsensical wording here: "Each day was almost the same every year.", "What people didn’t know was that he was involved in something that changed his life.", "He let go of his bow and clenched his ears for mercy.","On the mirror though, brought their heads to more confusion. ", etc Punctuation issues: Forgetting to use quotations for dialogue. "Then the figure spoke in a deep, raspy voice:There is nothing for you now. Only death. You will feel it yourself one day, unlike today. You will feel it, then feel nothing at all.", (")You have talent, I like that. This can help us much more than I thought. You are coming with us, but first, there is only one loose end you must tie up to become the newest Proxy. ("), etc. You forget to properly space when you do use quotations. "too son,”he starts,”my big brother", "spoke,”Don’t worry honey", "“Good to see you both,”he". You don't use apostrophes on possessive words. " weeks groceries" Wording issues: You change tense multiple times throughout the story from past tense ("He pressed the button again the knives slid back to their original place.") to present tense with any explanation ("“Good to see you both,”he says with a happy tone.", “You too,”Sammie answers.", "“You like the bow?”asks Vincent.", “It’s certainly intriguing,”answers Taylor.", etc) Story issues: we no longer accept slender man/proxy stories due to their tendency to be rushed and follow a generic storyline (both of which, your story does). I'm sorry but this story feels more like an introduction to your CPC (Creepypasta character) than an attempt at telling an actual scary story. Instead, the entire thing feels like a vehicle to describe your OC, what they look like, what weapons they use, what clothes they wear, etc which really doesn't make for an engaging or interesting story. I'm sorry, but there are a lot of issues here and your story is not up to quality standards. I hate to say it, but if you re-upload it, I will be forced to ban you for a day as it falls well below our standards. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 09:03, January 16, 2016 (UTC) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 09:04, January 16, 2016 (UTC) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 09:07, January 16, 2016 (UTC) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 09:07, January 16, 2016 (UTC)